The Moog

"Gooses are smart." - Ricky

"Pedro offers you his protection." - Napoleon Dynamite

It ain't cool being no Jive Turkey so close to Thanksgiving.

"Observational comedy is when a comedian pretends to have the same life as you, rather than being a philandering coke addict." - Stewart Lee

- i'm not singing for the future - i'm not dreaming of the past - i'm not talking of the first time - i never think about the last -

"In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is strength, in water there is bacteria." - David Auerbach

“The gods play no favorites.” - Charles Bukowski

"Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken." - Duke Leto Atreides

"Suave. God-damn you're one suave fucker." - Frank Booth

"If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments." - Steven Wright

Go see 'Isle of Dogs'. Its really great and how often do you get to see stop-motion animation on the big screen? Beautiful and intelligent.

Love Altern 8! I recently downloaded a drum n bass track that samples “watch your bass bins I’m telling ya!”

"Top one, nice one, get sorted. Check this next track out, you've got Asterix and Space. Watch your bass bins, i'm telling ya." - Altern-8

"Look, it is perfectly simple. No mobiles. No walkmans. None of that. Or any of the others." - Bernard Black

'You must always be intoxicated. On wine, poetry or virtue, as you wish. But you must get drunk.' - Charles Baudelaire

Happy Birthday to Stewart Lee, 50 today. Greatest British stand-up comedian of all time!

You let us down 'Masked Marvel'. Sorry boys, that's the way it goes.

- when little worlds collide - i’m trapped inside my embryonic cell - and flashing memories - are cast into the never ending well -

- she's walking down the street in front of my window - whistling funky tunes in the ears of my neighbours -

"He's riding very low in the saddle there, due to his huge-massive pumpkin ass." - Bob Fossil

"I know you're supposed to respect your elders, but some of them are fucking crazy." - Bubbles

Darling fascist bully boy, give me some more money, you bastard. May the seed of your loin be fruitful in the belly of your woman. - Neil

The pygmies arrived then the giants arrived, and they trod on one of the pygmies by accident and broke its leg.

"So it turns out that if you bang two halves of a horse together, it doesn’t make the sound of a coconut."- Ken Dodd

- mis-shapes, mistakes, misfits - raised on a diet of broken biscuits - we don't look the same as you - we don't do the things you do -