Legendary rocker & pioneering drug fiend Spiggy Topes passed away relatively quietly at his self-styled ashram in the hills outside Islamabad early Monday.
Spiggy started out in the mid-60's as singer with Spiggy & the Cockmonglers and had local hits with songs such as "I Can Only Give You About 30 Minutes", even supporting such luminaries as The Insensibles and Bob Scrote. The high-point of this period in his career however was probably an onstage fight with Nobby Young of The Cumquats at the Westboro Rock Festival in 1969. (Nobby had earlier caught Spiggy 'in flagrante': smearing his 15yr old daughter's breasts with peanut butter during British prog-rockers Dopy Mick's performance of their classic "Smoking A F@g". During his own performance, Nobby invited Spiggy onto the stage & proceeded to set about him with his ukelele.)
Drugs and an ill-fated relationship with Cynthia Hole of the pop group Whore took their toll however - Cynthia eloped with Charles Manson, who was later accused of eating her along with Spiggy's unborn child, although there was only circumstantial evidence of this at the time - and it wasn't until he was rescued from obscurity by cross-dressing producer Donny Gaybo that Spiggy found true success.
Hailed as the "Godfather of Ponk" in the 1970's, Spiggy was 96. He leaves a wife and over 9000 children.
Cause of death is unclear at this time, although 'spontaneous combustion' has not been ruled out. No body has been produced, and some fans are already claiming that he is still alive, and may in fact run for the US Presidency in 2012.
Reports that he was mistaken for Osama Bin Laden by American Special Forces on a covert mission are said to be "greatly exaggerated".