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Quick, give me 1004 likes so I can feel validated as a human!

"There's only one thing I hate more than lying. Skim milk. Which is water that's lying about being milk." - Ron Swanson

In every way we of Planet X are the Earthlings' superiors! We are a far older race, a far wiser one! Our science more advanced than theirs!

Hah! Little do the Earthlings suspect that I, Kurrgo, MASTER of Planet X, have been monitoring their actions for weeks!

Where, where the Hell is Bill?

DARKSEID IS

Used books, used people, used flowers, used love.

"Nothing really lasts, so it's foolish to cling to things, but I think that's the very reason I cling to things." - Cole Closser

^o,o^

I live with thirteen dead cats. A purple dog that wears spats. They're living out in the hall and I can't stand it anymore.

I got a silver machine. It flies sideways thru' time. It's an electricline. It's your Zodiac sign

I think the type of fruit that sounds most like a euphemism is probably 'jazz apples'.

Aghast goes next door to his neighbor, secretly excited, as Aforementioned was a hunter whom radio enthusiast wanted friendship and favor of

"Hello Steven, this is Clem Fandango, can you hear me?"

“It's like the day you realize dolls are dolls. I pick up my old self and I see it's silly. A toy I've played with too often."

"Hell is empty and all the Detolfs are here!"

... swinging its tail from anhedonia to schadenfreude and back again ...

"Emotions are harsh, man. I stuff mine deep inside and somehow wind up buying a shit ton of McFarland toys."

I used to have a tabby cat named Harry Nielson. Just thought you all should know.

This is hot meat; This is met-a-llk blood.

The ... address places it directly upstairs from a popular hashish bar owned, I'm guessing not coincidentally, by Dr. Little Poops himself.

Skylab never knew she had a purpose, returning to the air and ocean unamazed by her travels, unperturbed by her fall.

"I have successfully penetrated the next chamber of the alien's Interior..."

"What impulses, Dr. Sheppard?" "Well, I can't mention them. They're unauthorized, but they're nice that way."

Brian Chippendale...my dad said if he's a poor mans Gary panter then Gary panter is a unwell persons Robert crumb with the alcoholic shakes.