An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread

Discussion in 'Whatever' started by toothaction, Aug 26, 2015.

  1. dave zav

    dave zav Addicted

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Similarly, overheard at the local Family Dollar...
    Do you want to come cuddle with me tonight? Do you want me to White Castle your asshole?
     
  2. eckotyper

    eckotyper Post Pimp

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    well it was last week... and i overheard it...

    freshly graduated HS kids on their "senior trip" to Honolulu, were in a ABC store... short dude talking to his taller friend, points to Angry Orchard Apple cider... "Dude ever had one of these Angry orchards? They are MY SHITTTTTTTTTT" meanwhile while I have some Saporro in my hand waiting to pay. All I could think about is 1) why admit to have drinking a Angry Orchard. 2) Why love them so much that that is your GO TO DRINK when you are able to get someone to buy you alcohol since you are under age.
     
  3. Waterbear

    Waterbear Comment King

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Overheard at the library and I completely agree.

    "You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain, just like The Simpsons."
     
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  4. toothaction

    toothaction Team Tsubu Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    A short play I encountered at the coney today:

    Curtain:

    - I didn't even know that Idris Ebla was British. You know how you can't even tell the accent on British singers? Like, ever? Same thing.

    - Yeah... my mom's pissed that James Blonde is black.

    Scene.
     
  5. ultrakaiju

    ultrakaiju Die-Cast Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Well I certainly wish I couldn't tell the accent of the people having this conversation (and American 'pop' stars, in general), but I think you captured it David.

    Wait, did I miss something, or are they mistaking Blonde and Iren Mann?
     
  6. toothaction

    toothaction Team Tsubu Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Youve lost me, sir...
     
  7. ultrakaiju

    ultrakaiju Die-Cast Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Well, I did grow up on ZDF, if not that particular show. But I meant, has there been actual confirmation of Elba taking over the Bond mantle? If so, I missed it. I know his name has been bandied about for years now, though the current frontrunner is purported to be Hiddleston. Personally, I think it would be really great to see a relative unknown. I was referencing the no-doubt coming nerdroar (although not from actual comic book geeks, who are generally very good people and incredibly openminded) over this,

     
  8. toothaction

    toothaction Team Tsubu Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Heh. Yeah, I didn't engage the ladies on where they (and their moms) were getting their facts.
     
  9. T.J.

    T.J. Addicted

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    60 year old couple dressed in American Flag covered shirts: "Do you sell Funko Toys?"
    Me: "We sell a few Dory and Secret Life of Pets"
    Couple indignantly: "you don't have Trump?"
    Me: Silently walk away
     
  10. quentor

    quentor Addicted

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Son won a poop emoji pillow at an arcade that is a hat too.

    "My poop looks good on your head, don't worry, mines not the kind of poop that sticks"
    ......and countless others. It's been 3 days of poop jokes. I hate that poopie pillow.
     
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  11. toothaction

    toothaction Team Tsubu Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    "What's the 'correct' amount of blood in your stool?"
     
  12. ultrakaiju

    ultrakaiju Die-Cast Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Alas, some of these truly boggle the mind.
     
  13. ultrakaiju

    ultrakaiju Die-Cast Staff Member

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Something amusing I read in a comments section that I might just have to pull out at an opportune moment for use here on the board.

     
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  14. BrickBat

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Overheard a 50 something female coworker just exclaim to another coworker
    "Jesus, how far do you want me to bend over!?"
     
  15. Anti Social Andy

    Anti Social Andy Die-Cast

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Overheard in a US supermarket last week . . .

    'What you lookin' at coleslaw for man! We don't need no goddamn coleslaw . . . we got fried chicken and weed!'
     
  16. hellointerloper

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Welcome to 'Murica, Andy! :lol:
     
  17. phantomfauna

    phantomfauna Side Dealer

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Andy, round here if you take the "C" out of cocaine...Its Meth.
     
  18. Headhunter

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    "You like that Japanimation stuff?" Yeah ppl are still calling it that. lol
     
  19. Michael Beverage

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    I don't see the humour in that. That's a completely valid and rational statement.
    :lol:

    Unfortunately I can't really argue with the fact that a significant percentage of the U.S. populace are, in fact, complete idiots.

    Still, you will never have the chance to try my delicious fried chicken with your shitty attitude. ;)
     
  20. Michael Beverage

    Michael Beverage Line of Credit

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    That's interesting.....down here we call it Ocaine.
     
  21. wretchrd cp

    wretchrd cp Addicted

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Overheard, So I guess a meteor shower is/was tonight. Some guy was stated disappointedly" To much light pollution, I can't see any shooting stats." ...umm yeah to much light pollution, you are standing under a street lamp, in the middle of a large city.
     
  22. hellointerloper

    hellointerloper Post Pimp

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    I'm excited, driving down to Delaware today. Not just anyplace Delaware... Bumfuck middle of nowhere Delaware. METEORSSSSS!!!
    Well, if the rain doesn't hit again.
     
  23. Lalo

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    "i'm gonna knock that mustache off your face" - 5 year old incoming kindergartner when i told him to start lining up after recess. monkey bars is serious business.
     
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  24. Lixx

    Lixx Mr. Grumpy™

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    Men don't have expiration dates Chris, unfortunately women do....
     
  25. jojo the dog faced boy

    jojo the dog faced boy Side Dealer

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    An Actual Sentence Spoken To (Or Near) Me Today Thread
    "Most times there's something wrong on something when it needs to be fixed".....uh, ok Mr Rocket Surgeon sir....
     

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